Cookies!
by Esareh
Summary: Elle and Keira are selling cookies door to door. Aizawa thinks Watari could take L in a fight. Misa and Matsuda are idiots. Slight crack. Rated for use of the D-word. Gasp!


_Author's Note: I don't own Death Note. I don't own _ a _Death Note. I do have some cookies, though, but YOU CAN'T HAVE THEM._

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_This is a highly unpleasant scenario. _L mentally grumbled as he shuffled out of the elevator and towards the front door. Watari was too busy cleaning-up-after-you-are-you-a-detective-or-a-wild-hog-where-did-you-even-find-this-many-dishes so L, even though he was buried neck-deep in files that needed going through, even though he had a room full of idiots (Matsuda) to look after, even though _his hot chocolate was getting cold, _had to answer the door himself.

He sighed, halting in front of the massive steel door that capped the end of his massive, office-style building. He hit a switch on the wall, and the door swung open.

Two annoyed-looking girls, one brunette, one raven-haired, Light's age or perhaps a little older, stood in the doorway.

"Yes?" he asked.

"Hey, yeah, listen. Our little sisters are trying to win a trip to Space Land," the brunette began. "So we gotta go door to door selling this crap because-"

"Because we might or might not have burned down my father's tool shed." The raven-haired girl interrupted. "Although they have absolutely no evidence to prove that we did it." She added.

"Who are you?"

"I'm Elle." The brunette said.

"And I'm Keira." The black haired girl said.

L's eyes widened. "_You're _Kira? Is that a confession?" His brain was wheeling into overdrive. How had he been so far off the mark?

Keira blinked. "_Keira. _My _name _is _Keira._"

"Ah. Yes. Of course." He turned to Elle. "What, exactly, are you selling?"

"Just some cookies or whatever." She muttered. "You don't have to-"

"Cookies?" L said with slightly more emotion. "Come right in." he slung the door wide open and beckoned the girls inside.

"Uh… we're not really… comfortable walking into some strange dude's… what is this, anyway? A house? Mansion? Fall-out shelter?"

"I assure you I am perfectly trustworthy." L said confidently. "There is a room full of detectives on the twelfth floor that would be happy to vouch for my honor."

Keira and Elle looked at each other and blinked.

"I think we could take him down if we had to." Keira whispered.

"Right."

Probably not the best idea in the scheme of things, waltzing into a stranger's 60-story building, but if they didn't sell all those damn cookies, they'd never get ungrounded.

The girls followed L through the lobby and into the elevator. They shifted their backpacks and shot each other a look as the elevator skittered up twelve floors rather too quickly and came to what amounted to a screeching halt.

"Nuh-uh! Misa-Misa has _seen _Ryuzaki hit her Light-kun. He hits _hard_!" Misa's shrill voice pierced through the elevator doors.

"No way, Misa-Misa." Aizawa was saying as the doors slid open. "I'd put my money on Watari. I bet he's just fronting that frail old man bull-"

"Hey, there, Ryuzaki." Light said loudly.

"Hello." L replied, apparently oblivious.

"Who're your… friends?" Light asked. "I'm surprised that you trust anyone enough to bring them in here."

They are very trustworthy, Light-kun. They are selling cookies."

"Yup!" Elle exclaimed, comforted by the sight of other people. The entire situation had become exponentially less creepy. She slung her backpack over her shoulder and unzipped it. "We got those minty ones, the shortbready ones, those coconut thingies…"

"Well aren't you going to introduce us?" Matsuda demanded.

"Oh. How rude of me." L said flatly. "This is Elle," he gestured towards the brunette as he took a set, in his usual way, in his computer chair. "And this is Keira." He gestured towards the other girl.

"Wait," Matsuda began, obviously confused. "I thought _you _were L!"

Elle immediately stopped rifling through her bag and straightened. The two girls gaped at each other and then at L.

"Yeah!" Misa agreed. "And I thought Light-kun was Kira!"

L turned slowly towards Light, eyes wide, smiling his creepy little smile.

"Misa," Light growled. "You idiot."


End file.
